Lord Calvert Canadian

Today we have a special guest review by our good friend Jelf Boho in America. You may know Mr Boho from Mixed Drink Suggestion Hour on YouTube. Or Maybe not. When Jelf isn’t pounding down glasses of cheesy bourbon he can be seen enjoying picnics in hurricanes or chasing crabs around the house at 4am. Anyway, this is Booze Review’s first guest review so we hope you like it!

Lord Calvert Canadian

I must first admit that Canadian whiskey is not my forte. I tend to stick primarily to bourbon and scotch. In spite of this I acknowledge that variety is the spice of life, which is why I’ve gone out on a limb here to try something beyond my comfort zone. When I say “out on a limb”, I really mean “out on a limb which has already fallen from the tree and is now in the process of rotting amidst the undergrowth.”

Best served with no oranges

Best served with a side of oranges

At $14.99, this bottle was approximately half the price of what i usually spend on any sort of hard liquor. It claims to have been aged a brisk 36 months, (the bare minimum that is required for something to be called a “whiskey”). Strangely, there is a lack of any flavor text or attempts to sell itself to a potential buyer. Perhaps the most striking aspect of the bottle is the fact that the word “CANADIAN” appears in raised text no less than eighteen times. It’s as though the marketing team (perhaps a single person) decided (correctly) to not waste time trying to make this spirit appear to be something it is not, instead attempting to corner the market on one single facet alone. This is indeed a Canadian whiskey and they will NOT let you overlook that fact.

Upon cracking the seal, the first smell you are met with is akin to some sort of industrial-age medical disinfectant. In the spirit of being a cheap-ass, I decided to enjoy my first sample completely unadulterated. Wow. That was a mistake. It has an unfriendly spiciness to it, the sort of burn that accompanies something you probably shouldn’t be drinking. My mind once again wonders to disinfectants of years past. Immediately after swallowing, an unsettling dryness develops in my mouth, as if the entire first layer of cells were coaxed to an early grave. My mouth is now thoroughly disinfected of all life.

CANADIAN CANADIAN CANADIAN

CANADIAN CANADIAN CANADIAN

I quickly dropped an ice cube into the cup and allowed it to melt slightly. This greatly reduced the burn of the whiskey, however it allowed the secondary layer of flavor to surface. The one word that comes to mind is “bitter”. Actually, the word doesn’t so much “come to my mind” as it does “grab me by the back of my tongue and slap me across the face.” It’s like the same bitterness that remains in your mouth after you’ve vomited, though with none of the acidic sourness. I’m already feeling slightly buzzed from this one glass, although I haven’t eaten breakfast or lunch yet today.

The last thing I’m going to try, is mixing it with some root beer. For the sake of brevity: it works. Barely. I’m going to need a lot of root beer to finish this bottle.

Jelf Boho’s rating: 3/10 deliciouses

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17 Responses to Lord Calvert Canadian

  1. Bill Wentworth says:

    I’m drinking this right now with soda and a twist of lemon. Even the cheapest ass whiskey is palatable like this. Somehow though, I think Billy Dee Williams should be hawking this by saying, “works every time.”

  2. Wayne Mallan says:

    This review was apparently put together by a bourbon snob. I suspect the price not being what he usually pays has affected his judgement. I am an elderly gentleman and have a lifetime of experience sampling liquors of all kinds in a variety of cocktail concoctions. I have done the Crown Royal – Calvert Canadian taste test and found Calvert Canadian preferable over the more expensive Crown Royal Canadian Whiskey. My taste in Whiskey has migrated over the years weighted to the Bourbon side of the spectrum. Calvert Canadian, however, remains my regular choice in the blended whiskey realm.

    • Jafo says:

      Well, no offense, eh. But you have no taste, eh. Crown is a lot better than Lord Cavert because Crown Royal was made for a King. There is a reason it comes with a purple bag and it tastes better.

    • J.F Simonsen says:

      I don’t know if you are part of their PR department or not, but I kind of have to side with you. I prefer this over the standard ‘Famous Grouse’ that is quite prevalent in Europe.

      Disclaimer: I wish any who read this in the future to know I’ve only tried Famous Grouse and Highland Park (12yo in 2015) (so far. But by all that is good: single malts blew my mind).
      Anyway I’m probably quite mid-rung or far down the ladder. Despite my limited experience I would say Lord Calvert feels more honest about being alcohol than ‘Famous Grouse’; a brand which tries hard to mask the fact that it is low tier. For that simple reason alone I am inclined to side with Calvert. But I’m actually able to enjoy Calvert on its own with a few drops of water (and a good Lager on the side); something I couldn’t do with FG without straining my patience).
      I would still urge you to drink both with mixers, but Calvert is the only one of the two I’m able to drink neat with a few teaspoons of water (Norwegian tap-water) without thinking “I should probably add Coke to this”.

      And even as a Norwegian, I don’t think our water is all that.

  3. Mark Lupardus says:

    I also agree that the review given by a Jelf was based on the cost, since apparently he is use to spending (much)more on his choice of beverage. Right out of the gate he lets everyone know he is a costume to drinking more expensive hard liquor, there for he is going to look long and hard to find something to de-rate Lord Calvert before even giving it a chance. I have drank Lord Calvert for 30 years now and have sampled numerous brands of whiskey but I always return to my favorite. It is smooth and goes great with Mt Dew as a chaser. Whether its $2 or $50 I will continue to buy, drink and enjoy the smooth, sweet flavor of good ole, Lord Calvert Canadian Whiskey.

    • Anonymous says:

      Well said my friend…You n me both… I did enjoy the American version “calvert”… I have only found it in Fred Meyers so far….. now in a state with no Fred Meyers and am settling for the roost;

  4. Tony says:

    Mix it with 7 up. Just a little bit and its killer. KILLER!!!!

  5. Swampdog says:

    Drink what you like. screw what others think, Word to your mother!

  6. Swampdog says:

    Drink more whiskey!

  7. Jafo says:

    Lord Cavert is what hookers drink.

  8. JAMES says:

    anybody who would even think about mixing whiskey and rootbeer obviously knows absolutely nothing about either.

  9. Claus says:

    Well… I’m sitting in a cafĂ© in Norway, waiting for my bus home-based with a bottle of Lord Calvert in my bag. I walked into the government monopoly store hoping to buy Black Velvet- and because the miniscule store feels that having 6 bottle rows of each brand side by side is more important than variety…

    Curiosity landed me here. I will endeavor to keep you informed of the subjective results of my quest for brain damage!

  10. Michael Fletcher says:

    Fantastic base for Old Fashioneds if bourbon not handy. Mixed with bitters, sugar, orange and maraschino cherries, it passes the test

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